finally, after 5 days of loading.. i've come to the page to blog. terrible server...
er.. er... oh well, even though i've been wanting to blog, but there's nothing much really. other than the hail a few days back. hail in may... mayb snow in june~ 六月雪。兜儿冤。sigh..
just getting more and more stressful. after one week of trying of past yr papers, i'm still stuck at similar questions. really getting worried. i need enlightenment!! but just a week left.. and i still haf 2 subjects hafen mugged. dun like wordy subjects.. i hate memorising tings. cant b bothered.. too lazy. tat's y i'm one of the few pple who got a B3 in geography. dengz..
my panic is not just a matter of whether i can attain 2nd uppers or not, it's now bcome whether i can pass or not!! was too complacent, and now the confidence is not there... panic, worried, shattered. never felt b4. damn.. and it's affecting my mood badly.. i know. :( but, no choice. i can still rmb the time b4 i fly to london, my aunt (who is my guarantor) told me, she wun haf the money to pay back PUB if i cant make it, but bobian, since my mum asked her to be the guarantor, she cant refuse. and now.. i cant fail her!! i need to buck up.. my brain need to start working!! it's lagging so much... izit bcos i've become older?? urgh.. y isit that the other sporeans can do it but i'm still stagnant??
scared. that's the word. not just worried nor panic but scared. i finally understood the times when some of my frens tell me they just couldn't cope with their studies. no matter how hard u work, u still wun get it. helpless.
is it just mech eng?? other pple from other courses doesn't seem to b having tis prob... or is it just me??
aargh...
sorry for wasting ur time reading my venting of my frustration and nonsense. tis seems to b my only way of letting it out...